Just had to share this. Too funny! The Far North joke took me a few seconds… Ha, ha! I think I like the mammoth one best. – Thanks, Sir Ape!
Ron Chester, 89 years of age, was stopped by the police around 2 a.m. and was asked where he was going at that time of night.
Ron replied, “I’m on my way to a lecture about alcohol abuse and the effects it has on the human body, as well as smoking and staying out late.”
The officer asked, “Really? And who’s giving that lecture at this time of night?”
Ron replied, “That would be my wife.”
Blurb: (from Goodreads) Lorna is like everyone you’ve ever known. She is also like no one you’ll ever meet again. She’s just an ordinary person trying to make the best of the predicament du jour. What makes her different? The answers are revealed in this, her first, book. Here’s a hint: Lorna finds herself in more knotty predicaments than a novice knitter, yet she tells her often grim life story with a grin.
Was Lorna born curious and insecure or did her father’s mysterious disappearance when she was four years old make her that way? Was she really a Good Girl or was she clever enough to be an adept actress? Why did she wait until she was fifty years old to start saying what was really on her mind?
Lorna’s story is one of decisions and their consequences born out of ignorance, or innocence. Information was withheld; secrets were kept. Looking back, she asks, “How was I supposed to know?” And then she laughs, because what else can she do?
This book explores Lorna’s adventure of not knowing what was around the next corner (or why she was even turning a corner) and the sometimes delightful, sometimes shocking, but always enlightening surprises that awaited her
What I liked: Most everything about this novel. I don’t read many memoirs so I don’t have a lot to compare this too, but I really enjoyed this story. Lee is very good at telling her story. Despite the many sad events that happen to the author in her life, she tells her story in an entertaining and often funny manner. And it’s nice to see how she personally is able to make lemonade out of the many lemons that are thrown her way. The writing is good, and the story moves right along. I like the pictures she includes in each chapter, as well.
What I didn’t like: Over use of capitalization of words that don’t need to be capitalized, but that is just the writer in me.
I am currently enrolled in a copy editing certification program and last week we were working on writing good headlines. Our instructor had some wonderful examples of how not to write a headline.
These are for real!
Gators to face Seminoles with Peters out
Messiah climaxes in chorus of hallelujahs
Governor’s Penis Busy
(Should have been “pen is busy”)
Something went wrong in jet crash, expert says
Starr aghast at first lady sex position
Long Island stiffens for Lili’s blow
Organ festival ends in smashing climax
Include your children when baking cookies
Safety experts say school passengers should be belted
Drunk gets nine months in violin case
Survivor of Siamese twins joins parents
Iraqi head seeks arms
Panda mating fails; veterinarian takes over
Hard to imagine the copy editor missing these, but they did, for our enjoyment.